September 14, 2011

     During our wedding ceremony, Walt Baptiste, the spiritual guide who married us, gave us three gems of wisdom that I have carried with me for the last twenty years. Although, certainly, important in a marriage, they also apply to every personal reationship that we encounter in our lives.

     The first one to remember is that we are separate souls and spirits. Sometimes in close relationships we forget that everyone has a different way of looking at the world--different belief systems and emotional responses to different circumstances. Honor the other in his or her uniqueness and allow each person to be who they are.

     The second gem is to keep one another on a pedastal. When your friend or partner falls from the pedastal do they remain o n the ground or do we remember why we put them on the pedastal in the first place? How quickly do we lift them back up to the pace their goodness deserves? We all operate from desires and needs but the one need we all have is to be loved and appreciated.

     The third jewell is perhaps the most precious--to practice forgiveness. In a  relationship how often do you hold onto past wounds that youy percevie to have been inflicted by the other? These accumulated tensions are often pushed into the background yet they remain in your psyche and can be devastating to your health as well as your ability to be open and loving in life. When we consciously forgive others we are actually removing these negatives that block the free flow of life force and we become open channels of divine love.

     It is easy to forget that loving spiritually-based relationships bring out the strengths in both people and also the weaknesses. We too often blame the other person for throwing us off balance rather than being aware that we have allowed ourselves to become disconnected from our center. It may be that a friend or partner has lost center but is that a reason for us to lose our peace of mind?

     My husband and I have had many opportunities to follow the wise advice we were given twenty years ago and it has taken us to a greater understanding of ourselves individually and each other. I am happy to say the pedastal keeps growing higher.